This Is Not A Test, I Repeat, This Is Not A Test

Think you need to travel to an exotic location to see how animals act in the wild? Well, you don’t – all you need to do is pull the fire alarm at work. This morning the fire alarm went off and I am sure that if the building was really on fire we all would have burned to death. The stages of fire alarm reaction went as follows;
 Hear alarm - ears perk up and everyone freezes (like startled deer)
 What is going on - people start to stand up at their desks and quickly move their heads back and forth (like meerkats)
 Oh my god, it is not a test - everyone rushes for the fire exit (like the Serengeti migration – can’t compare it to a stampede of one type of animal)
 Thank God it is not raining - everyone shuffles to the assembly point and hangs about waiting to hear what is happening (like animals chilling at the watering hole)
 Break is over - we are given the ok so we shuffle up the fire stairs back to our desks (kinda like penguins as there are so many of us in a cramped space)
 Return to desk and resume work

The Waiting Game

Today, on TV, I stumbled across a Paula Abdul movie shot in Halifax. I hope that the Nova Scotia government and economy made a lot of money from it because man it sucked. On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being great, this was a -3. But then again, I did actually watch it so what does that say about me?

Yet Another Sign That I Am Old

There is a Rolling Stones concert at Twickenham Stadium this evening. The Stadium is about a mile away but I can pretty much hear the concert clear as day. All I keep thinking is - thank God I don't live right next to the Stadium. Soon I will be all 'Dagnabbit, turn down that gawd awful racket you bunch a good for nothing punks.'

Rant 17? - What, Sorry, What Did You Say? Sorry, I Didn't Hear That.

OK, not really a rant but I haven't done one in a while. I am glad that everything is getting back to normal at Heathrow and that everyone can fly away on holiday etc. But, man it was nice to have a break from the noise. I think they have lowered the flight path!

Consider Yourself Warned

I went to HMV today and bought (and have now watched) Saturday Night Live Best of Will Ferrell and Eddie Murphy so everyone better be ready for months of superfluous use of the following catch phrases;

• Dammit I'm Gumby
• I need more cowbell
• Scrumtrillescent (not sure if that spelling is correct)
• Fee Tines A Mady
• I’m Craig, I did drugs once
• You need never get up again
• I’ll take ape tit for $800, Alex

Shameless

I haven't done this in a while - so live with it. Isn't he gorgeous!

Dirty Dozen

Woooooohoooooooo, I can be clean again. After 12 days without hot water, my boiler is finally fixed. I am off to take a 3 hour long shower now.

PC Gremlins

Somehow those evil pixies got a hold of my machine and changed the comments posting settings on my Blog. Here I was thinking that no one was reading and that you all stopped loving me.

I think I have fixed it now and apologise for all my evil thoughts.